As I did that final walk towards my baptism, I started having flashbacks of my life.  The loved ones I have lost, and the traumatic life I have experienced.  I was looking into each person’s faces smiling up at me, encouraging me, and supporting me to make that final step.  Tears started forming in my eyes as they flowed down my cheeks.  In my head I am thinking, will I be good enough for God, and what if I make more mistakes in my life.  The final thought would be will he forgive me.  Until I looked up and saw Jesus on that cross looking down upon me, made me realized he made sure we are all forgiven for our sins.

                You could say I had that unique upbringing.  I had three different families; the one who gave birth to me, another who raised me as a child, and the final family was the one who raised me to the woman I am today.  I had some good memories growing up, but unfortunately I had a lot of traumatic memories.  As a baby, I was given up for adoption to a family at an early age.  The family who adopted me, I felt like I didn’t belong to, like I wasn’t meant to be there as a child.  Into that family I didn’t understand what love is, but I had it in my heart.  I was just a child, but my child’s spirit was broken, when I was being abused by a father I trusted and a mother who I felt didn’t love me.  That is when I came to my third family at the age of 13.  I came to my momma and daddy as a broken child.  She saw something in me though, and tried to bring confidence back into my life.  She wanted me to believe in myself.  She has taught me so much, how to respect others, how to be kind to others, and mainly love others no matter how or who they are.  I strived for more knowledge from her, but unfortunately she passed away when I was 17 years old.  Losing her made me feel I was alone again in this world and I didn’t know where to go next.
                That is when I became homeless living on the streets, with no support from anyone.  There was a part of me that just wanted to give up, until I had my son at 21. I looked down upon his face and realized now there is someone depending on me.  It was hard being single parent, until I met someone giving him my second child my daughter.  I thought my life will change finally, until he started abusing me for 11 years.  I tried so hard to get away from him, but I had to do the most heartfelt sacrifice in my life and let go of my children in order to live.  That brought me in the darkest part of my life and I felt I will never get out of it, until I met a man who later became my husband.
                I have known my husband over 20 years, but we were best friends first before we finally got married.  He has been there through the roughest part of my life.  He became my rock, and my soulmate.  Later on, we had our third child my youngest daughter.  She brought our family joy and hope.  We were the happiest family; felt we can conquer the world.  Until I lost my Father Christmas Eve 2008, who brought me wisdom, support, and love.  I felt I lost the last of my family, until I realized I gained a family. My in-laws helped me by supporting me in the loss of my father.  I knew then I finally belong somewhere with a loving family.
               
What finally made my decision to become a Catholic was in February 7, 2013.  I had a surgery done that I thought would change my life.  Instead, it brought pain, suffering, and almost death in my life. For three years I was deathly sick, and waited for my day to end from this earth.  My sponsor Steve Katonka would say “Let me come over and pray with the rosary so God would be there for you.”  To be honest I didn’t think not even God could help me.  He would do this each week for three years.  Until one day he said, “Sharisse let me try this one more time because this day is a special day.”  At the time I was willing to try anything.  A week later on Easter 2016 I got really sick and knew this was finally the day I will leave from this earth.  My husband rushed me to the hospital, and brought me to this doctor.  The doctor found out the problem and did a 9 hour surgery to fix me up.  Before I went into surgery, I made a promise to God and myself if I live I will finally take that last step to baptism to change my life. 
                Well as you can see I am here to tell you he saved my life.  I made that promise and started RCIA classes, in September 2016.  Not only I wanted to start my journey by myself, I asked my youngest daughter to join me as well.  I am so proud of her to take this step to Christ, with me. I had to figure out who would be the best sponsor for me and my daughter.  There was no question in my mind the one person that prayed and stayed by my side Steve Katonka.  I knew he would help us get through this journey.  I even knew that the devil himself will stop me, which he did try by distracting me.  My mother in law passed away during my journey.  I knew if I stop now I won’t be able to see her, my momma and my daddy one day. So I worked even harder to get to that final day.  I realized throughout my life, I didn’t know who or what God was, but I had faith and he was there.  Faith was what brought me to that final walk to Father John.  After Father John poured the holy water and anointed me all those burdens has lifted up upon me.  I felt so light and rejoiced that I finally have Christ in my life.  I wanted people to hear my story because I know we all have had a lot of rough times in our lives, but I am here to tell you there is a light at the end of that tunnel.  I know I have a job to do, and that is to share my life to everyone and bring Christ in their lives. Just remember no matter what you go through he is there to take that burden from you.  All you have to do is Believe and have Faith! Thank you for listening to my story.
Written by:  Sharisse Lowe